What are the signs of covert narcissistic abuse that most people miss?

If you have a savings account, don’t tell them about it! They will find ways to make you spend that money so you won’t have it. They don’t want you to have any means to escape from them when things get really bad, and they will.

If your gut is telling you not to trust this person, you need to listen. Do they call you at the strangest moments? Like the second you get out of bed, even though it’s never the same time of the day? They seem to always call at the oddest times, like the moment you step foot out of the bedroom? Check your house for hidden cameras. Narcissist are control freaks that want to keep you on a leash.

Being with a narcissist will darken your soul and you will never trust anyone again. They are soul – sucking monsters.

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“Oh, he’s just tired, he works really hard all day” or “he didn’t mean it”, “he was just joking”, “ he’s really a nice person you just have to get to know him.” “he’s going through a lot right now”. The sad thing is you believe what you are saying because he/she has manipulated you for so long that they can make you believe just about anything.

Once the narcissist has reeled you in and the abuse starts, you will constantly say “I’m sorry”. You’ll apologize for just breathing. Other people will tell you to stop apologizing because you’re doing it about every other sentence. You’ll jump at the slightest noise. Your nerves will be shot and you’ll constantly worry. You’ll stop going places and spending time with friends and family. You will, at some point, stop speaking to anyone other than the narcissist.

They are skilled manipulators. They’ve been manipulating people their entire lives and they are good at it. They are habitual liars and can lie to your face without you ever realizing it. The only way you will ever catch them in a lie is when they’ve lied about everything so much they can’t keep the lies straight. When you call them out on it and point out the lie, they will try to convince you that you are crazy, that they never said that.

Hello,hope y'all doin good, i came to Quora to share my strange story , a very weird one , a story when luck smiled at me ,maybe u will enjoy it , let's begin,have fun... A year ago ,I was a real porn addicted(btw I was 18) ,but never had sex before, I don't have a gf I didn't try to find one even ,always thinking to go to find a sex worker but then I just don't , everyday watching different bodies getting fucked and everyday enjoying. One day, I was watching porn, a big ass lady with big boobs ,just after seeing her the image of my female cousin poped in my mind, (let's introduce her : she's 35 years old , very big ass , nice boobs ,not very big but nice,always wearing tight clothes , she's divorced ) and I thought of me fucking her ,I never had sexual desires for her but now I do days went by and when I met her I was so horny ,I couldn't stay with the family cz my penis was clearly erected , I realized this is my first time I get horny for one of my family ,it not illegal in my country.well to make a long story short( if u want details just text me I will tell u 😊),I decided to give her signs that I want to fuck her,finally I decided to have sex and with my cousin , I thought it is the best beggining for me, i started touching her when I came across her in a narrow place , make her feel my hard cock when we hug , I thought it will hard and I will be ashamed but no , I felt nothing and she said nothing , probably she thought it was by mistake,anyways, I decided then to talk with her about sex, waited for her to be alone in a room and talk with her, I confessed everything about me watching porn and addicted..etc,she said it's normal and u are growing up and u must have sex,well at that time I was like whaaat????? Well I didn't control myself and asked her for sex ( horny like I Ve never been before) she said that she will think Abt it ,2 weeka went by then she called me ,telling that she reserved a room in a hotel and we meet tonight ,we met,and bruuhh, sex is great , I mean, I had to find a pirstitue ,what I was waiting for to have such a feeling ????, I will never forget that night, I started kissing her she was kissing hard ,she misses sex so bad , she sucked my dick and swallowed my semen ,I felt I'm in a dream , then when fucked ,her ass was very big and the anus was open ,didn't struggle to get my hard cock inside it , she was obviously missing sex , she was shouting ,fuck me yh fuck me , I go fast after every word until I cum , we did that 3 times , then we went to her pussy , using condoms I fucked her so hard the moans were higher , everything was perfect ,in the end I asked her to lick her body , licked pussy ,ass, boobs,then she sucked my cock until we sleeped ,all I know that she was dirty ,well before even having sex with her I knew she is an open minded woman , and a woman that looks that she donesnt know anything , but she knows everything, but never expected having sex with her ,well she was horny and that helped...but no one of us regretted that sex ever.. We still have sex from time to time ,and I started having sex with sex workers , joining threesomes..etc If u want pics of her text me.

The narcissist will try to turn you against your own family or anyone else that you know. Another tactic to isolate you from everyone. The narcissist doesn’t want anyone to interfere or convince you to leave him/her. After all, if you have no where to go, you won’t be able to leave.

You’ll make excuses for their behavior and defend them when your friends or family say something negative or just point out how terrible you are being treated. You’ve basically been brainwashed from the moment you let this person into your life. You’ll say things like;

Don’t wait until it’s too late and you are the one answering these questions about narcissist… run a background check on this person! Knowledge is power and I’m sure we all wish we had done just that. Don’t tell him/her you ran a background check. Ask questions you already have answers to and see if they lie about where they’ve lived or if they’ve ever been in trouble. Remember … they LIE! Especially if they’ve been to jail or prison. If they have, you need to get the real reason they were there because they’ll never tell you the truth.

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In the beginning they will appear to be the most self-less, giving, loving, caring individual that you have ever met. They will take you out to nice restaurants multiple times a week. They will give you gifts. As the relationship progresses, you will hear them complain about their exes. They will make comments like She/ He was bipolar, or depressed, or always in bed, high-maintenance, things of that nature. They will knock down anyone they've ever had a relationship with and it will always result in something that was mentally wrong with them. They will have you convinced that you are so lucky to have them in your life and that they genuinely care about your well-being.

They will cause you to lose your self-esteem. They will point out tiny flaws on your skin. They will point out you’ve gained weight or your stomach looks swollen, they will find cruel things to hurt you with even if you only gained 2 lbs. They will make you feel like you gained 40. You may even start wearing make up to bed to sleep in because they have hurt your feelings about a flaw. When they start calling you nasty names, it only gets worse from there. They are cruel monsters.

When you’re grocery shopping together because he/she won’t let you out of their sight. If you choose something only you like, they’ll throw a fit over the price embarrassing you in front of everyone so that you will put it back and only get the things that he/she likes.

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You’ll stop buying things for yourself so that you don’t anger the narcissist. They will buy themselves expensive things and when it comes to you spending $10.00, they’ll say “Why do you need that?”, “don’t you already have enough?” They will nag you until you say “just forget it.”.

When the abuse has gone on for so long, you start having panic attacks. You probably never experienced one in your entire life until that moment. You’ll become depressed and withdrawn. You will feel like there is no way out and the narcissist will find ways from the beginning to have you become dependent on them.

They are very secretive. Locking phones and computers quickly if you enter the room, possibly hiding porn or that they are talking to other people. They will pretend that they did it to give you their undivided attention. They are very jealous. They will want to keep you all to themselves and disguise it with they love you so much and can’t bare to be without you all the time. You will get the feeling something is off and you will brush it off like you are over reacting. You’re not over reacting!

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